The Festivus for the rest of us…

I Love Christmas.
Who doesn’t?
I love giving presents, I love receiving presents, I love Christmas food and I love catching up with my family and friends.
There’s really only one thing I can’t stand about Christmas… The shizen TV programming.

Anyhoo, when I received an invite to a Longest Table event at The Franklin Boutique Hotel and they were calling it ‘Christmas in July’, I thought to myself… Hells yeah sista!
Christmas… in July? I’m in.

I’m so proud to be an ambassador for The Longest Table and I want to help support all the awesome legends who are out there, getting on board and making a difference.
This charity has brought so many wonderful people into my life. It’s truly been a blessing.
Kari, our host for today, is another amazing person, I am lucky to have met.

I arrived at the Franklin, and I couldn’t help but wonder, why I’d never been there before.
It’s such a cool pub.
The atmosphere is super relaxed, and a little bit quirky.
Between the hard wood tables and the exposed brickwork, the leather stools and coloured panelling, this pub is so inviting, you can almost hear it calling you…

In fact it did call me, loudly.
My first instinct upon entering the doors was to make a beeline for the bar.
They have several different (delicious) beers and ciders on tap, but I could also smell something brewing that I’m telling you peeps, always gets my whistle wet… Mulled Wine.
Oh Yes. YES, YES, YES!
This Festivus was going to be good. I knew it from the start.
Soon my friends Dem and Chloe arrived, as well as Chloe’s good friend Beck.
I immediately ordered a Mulled Wine, while Dem (who’s being a true champ and is currently abstaining for Dry July) ordered an Espresso Mock-tini.
We found a place to park ourselves amongst the communal tables that had been set for the meal, and immediately readied ourselves for the Russian feast that was soon to come.

NEVER in my wildest dreams, could I imagine the unbelievable spread that did arrive.
Because of the sheer quantity of food we were served and the fact that it was so damn delicious, I continued eating way past my cut-off point, and became so grossly full that I began plunging into a food coma at the table.
Every direction you turned, there was another lunch guest gurgling and groaning from the weight and strain of their overfilled stomachs.
And, ordinarily, overeating to this capacity will usually turn me off something for a few years, if not for life…
Like the time I ate a family sized platter of my sister Dyani’s, Nachos with Slow cooked Mexican Beef and I was so sick afterwards, I couldn’t eat Avocado’s for about 5 years.
But, remarkably, I am not put off Russian food.
Oh no, I’ll happily eat another Cabbage roll right now. I actually toyed with the idea of asking for a doggy bag…

First Course in our Christmas feast…
Borscht with Chilli and Fennel flat bread.
I’ve never before eaten Borscht, although I’ve always wanted to.
I absolutely love Beetroot, and in a soup, it’s a downright goal kicker! I will now be making it for my family.
The soup was delicious.
The beetroot flavour was there, but you could also taste the delicious stock and dill underneath it. The super light and tasty flat bread was a perfect accompaniment, and the swirl of Sour Cream just finished it off to a tee.
I devoured my soup so quickly, it was more like annihilation.
And, because I truly couldn’t give a rats wazoo what people think, and really love the top I was wearing, I used a bib.
We all wanted more of the bread… but when the starter is that good, you know you better leave room for main.

And, the main event… what can I say, it was truly a treasure to behold and served in my favourite way, family style.
I’m a huge advocate of communal eating.
I love serving different dishes and letting my guests choose for themselves.
To me, it’s what food is all about, togetherness and sharing.
But as these dishes started rolling in, one after the other, even I knew that my greedy eyes weren’t big enough for this spread.

Pork Shaslick with Onions was first off the rank and came served with lashings of tangy Yellow mustard.
Wow, this pork was so meltingly tender, I was truly blown away.
The flavour of it was delicate, but actually quite intense. It was definitely the best pork shaslick I can remember eating and I would happily eat it, again and again.
But alas, I need to save room…

Olivie… better known as Russian Potato salad.
I had a huge spoonful of this truly tasty salad next to my shaslick.
Y.U.M.
The potatoes were perfectly cooked, fluffy and soft, but still holding their shape. The gorgeous dressing was tangy with wholegrain mustard and dill. There were cornichons dancing through the salad and it was all topped off with my favourite ingredient, boiled Egg.
Yes peeps, I’m part German, could you tell…?

Next up… hot Sauerkraut.
Before we had a chance to plate any up (and because we were all too busy gas-bagging), someone at the table next to us, lurched from the sidelines and pinched the bowl.
Startled, I sat there wondering… will it return to me? Dear God, send it back!
It did eventually return, albeit a little less voluptuous…
But, my word I do love Sauerkraut, and this one didn’t disappoint.
The cabbage was perfectly cooked and the speck gave off just the right amount of flavour. I can’t tell you what was in the sauce, however there was the tang of vinegar, but it wasn’t extreme.
This Sauerkraut was so yummy, the absolute likelihood, of major cabbage related stomach gas still wasn’t enough to deter me from wolfing it down like I hadn’t eaten for a year.

And shortly thereafter, I knew this future gas likelihood was actually more of a certainty, because next up… we had Cabbage rolls.
There are no words.
The entire table fell into silence while we were eating these.
DISH OF THE DAY.
If Pete and Manu were here, they’d give this one a 10. I am actually, really kicking myself for not getting that doggy bag…

The rolls were always going to be a tough act to follow, but the next dish definitely held its own.
Kulebyaka, a whole side of Salmon baked in pastry with Mushroom duxelles, or another way of saying it… ‘Fish Pie’.
Incredible.
The Salmon was perfectly cooked. So moist and tender. The mushrooms had so much flavour, the pastry was light and flaky and there was not a bone in sight.
I’d love to eat this dish again, on a cold winter’s eve with a gorgeous glass of wine and my main man, Cory.
I’m going to try and recreate it, this much I know.

So, about this time I started spiraling into my comatose groaning-zombie state.
I was so full, that the thought of ingesting more food was beginning to fill me with dread… but, like any good soldier, I refused to give up. Instead, I kept calm and carried on.
As they say, when the going gets tough… the tough, just unbutton their trousers.

Dessert.
Now, this is usually a course I can forgo without regret. But, I would’ve regretted this.
Ponchiki Donut.
I do not know what these are, nor how they were made, all I can say is this…
Imagine, if you will, a super light and fluffy, yet crispy and crunchy donut covered in a spiced sugar drizzled with a sticky syrup of some kind… it tasted like honey, but was dark like molasses.
Divine, in every way.
And last, but certainly not least, the Cheese platter.
Oh my God, they know my Achilles heel.
I cannot, I repeat… I CANNOT ever go past the cheese platter.
Oh Lord, have mercy!
At this stage, I was seriously thanking myself for having the foresight to wear stretch jeans.

After eating we all sat there, completely in awe of what we’d just experienced.
Then, the raffle was drawn.
Chloe won an accommodation voucher for a night, to stay in one of the Franklin’s beautiful, modern rooms.
I have to say, I’m slightly jealous.
If you are looking for somewhere a little different to stay in Adelaide, it’s centrally located and a superb choice.
Hilariously, her sexy date evening came courtesy of ticket No.69.
One might say, it was meant to be…

On top of all the amazing food and awesome hospitality, we also received 3 drinks of our choosing with the meal.
My choices…
Moscow Mule, Mulled Wine and my new favourite winter drink… Mulled Cider.
The Cider was like drinking a spiced, apple pie. A-may-zing.
There were also the musical stylings of an awesome Jazz band called the Adam Page Trio.
Usually, if the live lunchtime music’s to loud to talk over, it really gets my goat, but listening to these guys… I didn’t mind at all.
And, who doesn’t love a saxaphone? I’ve been a fan since my primary school obsession with the sax player from Johnny Diesel and the Injectors.

Note to self: You are now a respectable mother, and should not admit to embarrassing childhood crushes on men that were far too old for you.

Demsy and I have already decided, that we will certainly be back.
The Franklin is far too good, to never return.
She’s planning her next birthday there, and I have to say, I’m excited about it.
If the food for a one-off Festivus feast was this great… imagine what their regular menu is like?
I have it on very good authority, that their Hotdogs are heavenly and the pub grub they serve is truly tantalizing. I look forward to finding out for myself.
They’ve also got a generous and airy beer garden, a must in my book, for any event.

This pub is a true Adelaide gem, and the people who work there, are absolute diamonds.
An amazing event, for an awesome cause.
Thank you, Kari and the Franklin Hotel for a truly memorable meal and until we meet again…
Zazdarovje and do svidaniya!

The Franklin Boutique Hotel

92 Franklin Street, Adelaide SA 5000

(08) 8410 0036

http://www.thefranklinhotel.com.au/